- SUCKING A SNAKE BITE WILL REMOVE VENOM – a venom delivering bite will immediately enter the blood stream. Sucking the bite will solely transfer more bacteria to the affected area and an addition into your mouth and esophagus. If someone gets bitten, low keep heart rate and lower limb below heart level …(and of course, go to hospital!)
- PLAY DEAD UNDER BEAR ATTACK – Unless in the your backyard, the general consensus is that one should quietly back away- otherwise in this situation (i.e. in yard or, for example, campsite) make yourself large and loud, which should will usually scare it off.In the case of an actual attack it is important to note a brown or grizzly bear attacks to defend itself or its cubs- thus noises and pretend charges are solely a warning tactic. In this case- back away from a defensive attack slowly. If the bear makes contact, play dead lying on your stomach with your hands over your neck. But in the rare case of a predatory attack, which comes with no warning (or if the bear seems to be stalking you), fight for your life.
- IF IN WILDERNESS- SOURCE FOOD IMMEDIATELY – One can survive up to six weeks without food (this is a estimate and dependant on starting point and existing heath issues, however shelter and water are priorities).
- IF LOST IN A DESERT- DRINK FLUID FROM CACTUS – Unless one is experiences enough to identify the correct type of barrel cactus than allows safe water filtration, you are likely to end up vomiting, thus releasing more precious contents…leaving you even more dehydrated
- THE NORTH SIDE OF THE TREE HOSTS THE GROWING MOSS- the variable is environmental conditions, only this will affect the location of moss.
- IF AN ANIMAL EATS IT, YOU CAN EAT IT – easily proven wrong by the instance of birds and squirrels- many can eats nuts and seeds that would poison a human.
- IF SOMEONE IS FREEZING, RUB THEIR SKIN OR PLACE THEM IN A HOT TUB- Frostbitten skin is fragile and thus damaged by rubbing, hot water can be shocking or damaging for someone dealing with frostbite and hypothermia. Use blankets and hot water bottles (most effective placed under armpits) to warm up slowly.
- IN THE CASE OF A SHARK ATTACK, PUNCH THE NOSE – targeting the nose of a moving shark is difficult- it is better to place a solid object between you and offensive shark (or if this isn’t an option, claw at it’s eyes and gills).
- IF CAUGHT IN RIP CURRENT, TRAVEL PARALLEL TO SHORE- Swimming directly parallel to shore works effectively only if the current goes directly out to sea – it is a better idea to remain alongside the shore, but swim perpendicular to the current as much as possible “at an angle away from the current and towards the shore”. Of course don’t tire yourself out too much; it shouldn’t feel like you are going upstream. If unable to swim out- tread water until this is possible.
So, upon starting this magnificent specimen of a blog account (*cue huffs of sarcasm*) from the convenient location of my bedroom, I over-enthusiasticly expected 50,000 views a day and a minimum or 5,000 likes on each blog…okay slight exaggeration but guess what? IT DIDN’T HAPPEN! Funny that…
I am now (4 weeks) older and (4 weeks) wiser, and able to understand the slow pace at which life and progress happens in this world, and realise I must seek alternate approaches. Approach 1: spend 24 hours a day begging for follows (sorry if you are one of many victims I have once targeted), or more preferably, approach 2: team up with another account at a similar stage.
When I say “team up” I do not meant merging accounts because (a) that is technologically impossible and (b) I am too selfish to go half. I simply mean we support each other along our journeys to world wide international internet fame. Well almost. My idea of this would entail becoming internet acquaintances (friendship comes next, obviously), bouncing ideas of one another and growing our account together. Perhaps this would mean liking/commenting on each others blogs (to make us seem vaguely popular), and giving suggestions as to our next blog topic.
If anyone is interested, please leave a comment below or if you are the shy type, email email@example.com or contact one of the social media links situated somewhere near the location of this blog- I have no idea where hence the next to non-existent explanation.
The lack of comments is clearly due to my deletion of all previous contact, obviously (*cries to self*).
If you have, haven’t or even never will read this blog, I thank you anyway.