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Crazy Hair Life- Familiar?

 

Photo 31-05-2017, 15 03 33

Anyone else accustomed to this way of life? :)

PLOTTWISTT X

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Diet Foods That Are The WORST For Weight Loss

I came across a lecture on a website recently, which reminded us all of the basic yet fundamentally important fact that: ‘just because it says “diet” or “low-fat” does not mean it is healthy for you.’

A diet expert tells those longing for a slimmer body: ‘Don’t be afraid of carbsquinoa, lentils and barley actually aid in weight loss. High-fat foods are not the enemy either – avocado, fatty fish and coconut oil are actually very good for you.’


So here goes…diet foods the effectively defeat the objective:


  1. FLAVOURED FAT-FREE YOGART: “When companies take out the fat, they add in Image result for tumblr yogurt flavouredsugar. Although they might appear lower in calories, sometimes a single serving of yogurt can contain up to 15 grams of sugar,” a diet expert explains. “Choose plain-Greek yogurt because it is higher in protein and add in your own flavour such as fresh berries or cinnamon.”

2.   STORE PURCHASED SMOOTHIES: “Many store bought smoothies are loaded with high calorie ingredients, preservatives, and artificial sweeteners that bring their “health” factor down,” says Roots. “To be safe make a smoothie at home, it’s very easy and then you know exactly what is going in it!”

 


3.  ‘LIGHT’ SALAD DRESSINGS: According to research- “you need to eat salads with fat-based dressings to get the most out of the vegetables. They also contain very few calories, which may be a good thing for weight loss, but a salad with low-calories will not keep you full for long. Therefore, you will end up snacking or eating more at your next meal.”


4.  FAST FOOD SALADS: According to ABCNews: “the Grilled Chicken Bacon Ranch salad at McDonalds contains 13 grams of fat and 270 calories, and with light balsamic vinaigrette dressing it comes to 360 calories and 21 grams of fat”


5.  PROTEIN / MEAL REPLACEMENT BARS: “The general rules are when you flip the bar over and notice the ingredient list takes up almost the entire side (which means it’s loaded with chemicals and fillers), it contains more than 200 calories per serving, and contains more than 8-10 grams of sugar, it is closer to a candy bar and should be avoided,” Roots says.


6.  TRIAL MIX: “Nuts, dried fruit and seeds mixed together seem like a great diet food to snack on, but the truth is that it is extremely difficult to stick to the proper serving size. Many people do not realise how much they are eating and they end up consuming almost a half a day’s worth of calories in one sitting.” Now that’s an achievement if you ask me…perhaps not the right one though. Ah well. Next time!


7.  ORGANIC COOKIES: “Just because something is organic doesn’t mean it is healthy or if a package of cookies only has 100 calories, most likely it is loaded with artificial sweeteners and chemicals, which make them actually worse for you than eating an actual cookie.”


8.  DIET COLA (or ‘soda’ if you are that way inclined): Again, we are reminded of another fundamental fact: “Just because it has the word “diet” in it does not mean its diet-friendly.” The site goes on to elaborate: “Diet soda has been linked to the development of metabolic syndrome and obesity. In a study conducted by the University of Texas Health Science Centre, people who drank two or more diet sodas a day had waist sizes that were six times bigger than those who didn’t drink diet soda.


9.  GLUTEN FREE…ANYTHING!: The site expands- “Some gluten-free foods are healthy, but the truth is, there are many foods claiming to be gluten-free that are not diet friendly. Any food that is pre-packaged will never be as good as eating a food in its natural form such as fruits, vegetables, and lean protein,” says Roots. When choosing gluten-free foods make sure you check the nutrition labels for ingredients such as the sugar content, sodium level and calories – “the more ingredients you can’t pronounce, the worse it is for you.


10.  FRUIT JUICE: An expert reports: “Fruit juice isn’t always as fresh and natural as it may seem. It may even contain more sugar and calories that a sugary soft drink.” According to Authority Nutrition, “fruit juice contains some nutrients, but less compared to many plant foods. It contains no fibre and is just as high in sugar and calories as most sugar-sweetened beverages.”


11.  GRANOLA: “Granola and granola bars may be one of the least healthy snacks – most are loaded with sugar and have very little fibre. One cup of granola can equal about 600 calories, about 25 grams of sugar and almost 30 grams of fat. If you really want to purchase granola, make sure you read the labels and choose the option low in calories and fat.”


12.  FROZEN DINNERS: “most often these pre-portioned frozen dinners are loaded with preservatives and sodium and are lacking enough vegetables to have nutritional value,” says Roots. She suggests creating your own “frozen dinner,” by making a large portion of something like chicken stir-fry and keeping in in a tupperware container in the freezer for the week.


13. Image result for tumblr dreid fruit DRIED FRUIT: So, it’s a common fact: fruit is great for a diet snack”. This is because, of course “it’s loaded with vitamins and minerals that are good for your health”. A sitte claims: “Dried fruit tends to be high in calories and natural sugar. Also, considering dried fruit is energy-dense, it’s much easier to eat large amounts of it at a time, which in turn can result in excess sugar and calorie intake”- according to Authority Nutrition.


14.  RICE CAKES: Perhaps a bit of a shocker to some this one- “Rice cakes rank high on the glycaemic index, making it the kind of carbohydrate that will leave you hungry again in a couple hours, while also sending your blood sugar soaring”.


15.  VEGGIE BURGERS: The truth is revealed…”these burgers aren’t made with just vegetables; they are based on processed soy. They also tend to have an excess amount of sodium, and when you add toppings to it, your calorie consumption will go sky high.”


 

 

5 WAYS TO INSTANTLY BOOST YOUR ENERGY~ PLOTTWISTT

The result of these methods is said to turn your body into a ‘fatigue-fighting machine’…I’m not so sure these have the ability to transform a human into something bionic but I’m sure they’d do something  just as effective (only slightly less risky, I hope.)

So here goes… five exhilarating ways to instantly boost your energy:


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FIND SOMETHING RED: It’s odd maybe, well actually, it’s not. red is an emotive colour that is capable of physically changing the body: it enhances blood pressure and can boost heart rate. It’s known as a ‘stimulant colour’…
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YAWNING – seems trivial and obvious right? But yawning is a way of cooling of your brain, and hence re-energizing it. (Fun fact: did you know the average yawn lasts for 6 seconds? Well, the more you know!)
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RUNNING/ WALKING- 2 hours…that’s how many hours of energy on average you will have after only a brief 10 minute walk.
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GET ON YOUTUBE- run and tell your parents: watching videos like dancing hamster (or ay other hilarious creation) will boost your blood pressure and increase heart rate, hence leaving you with a new and energised self.
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CHIA SEEDS- sprinkle some of these around! (Preferably keeping them on your salads, thanks). They are choka-bloka with Vitamin B, protein and fibre.
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STRETCH!- Bored? Tired? Lacking energy? Try this: stand in the doorway facing forwards with your feet several inches apart. Reach the sides of the frame, now grab the frame with your fingers and push your chest forwards, until you feel a stretch in your torso and back. Hold this for 30 seconds. The exercise stimulates the ‘sympathetic nervous system’; this hence, is clearly a beneficial little stretch.

Ask yourself these questions:

I have a Facebook account; which may surprise you considering I write like a 55 year old lonely man. But every once in a while I come across some inspirational sh*t which really mucks up my already mentally unstable mind. But like I say, it’s inspirational sh*t.

So, (not) being a lonely 55 year old man, I thought I would create some inspirational sh*t…well. Google and I. We are very fond of one another…um. I felt a little more lonely when researching questions, which involved the typing of “questions to ask y…”, which I would have followed up with “yourself”, had the suggestions not been:

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No suggestion for questions to “yourself”? Okay. *Creeps back to hole in ground*.

So without more-damn-a-do, lets ask questions, to yourself, to make you seriously re-contemplate your potentially already contemplated life. Yeah.

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> Question to ask yourself number one (in your face Google- this is history, apparently)-

If this were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today? 

(the preferable answer being yes, if no, then GET A SHIFT WITH YOUR LIFE WOMEN/MAN!)

> Question two:

What matters most in my life?

(Apart from Nutella, and Joey Graceffa. Oh and Cameron Dallas. And Tyler Oakley, and Troye Sivan and the WHOLE youtube community. #TeamInternet).

> Question three:

Have I done anything lately worth remembering?

(Apart from reading this blog. Obviously. Obviously.)

>Question four:

What have I given up on?

(A friend? A goal? Reading this blog? < OI)

> Questionio five:

If I had to instill one piece of advice in a newborn baby’s mind, what advice would I give?

(*Slush warning*)

>Question se…six:

If I try to fail, and succeed, which have I done?

(Failed, obviously. Right?)

>Question seven:

What do I need to change about myself?

(Don’t say your phone, or your clothes, or your eyebrows, think DEEPER.)

>Question eight:

How many of my friends would I trust with my life?

(“With my life” being like…hanging of a cliff over a shark infested ocean, or something.)

>Question nine:

What do I want most in life?

(For me- utter happiness. *Face palm at self*)

>Question ten:

Which is worse: failing or never trying?

(Come on…DUH)


Thank you for reading this wee snippet of a blog I threw together for my millions of (non existent) viewers…I appreciate your time! I hope you now have fully re-evaluated your life and will take any necessary action…or whatever.

Sx

MAYBELLINE NEW YORK MASTER GRAPHIC LIQUID EYELINER: REVIEW| YAY OR NAY?

So this is undeniably an eyeliner, so I can start of by saying it lines the eyes…sometimes. Its temperamental nature leaves a nice ‘bold’ INVISIBLE  line above the lashes, completely contradicting the whole nature of the product. The packaging states:

“Liquid marker eyeliner for a bold graphic look.”

Without the ‘bold graphicness‘, the eyeliner is shaping up to be the equivalent of that sold in Poundland (*POUNDLAND PROMO: EYELINERS, MASCARAS, LIPSTICKS FOR ONLY £1, ROLL UP ROLL UP*).

However, on the rare occasions that it actually decides to do its job, the result can be somewhat satisfactory. As promised, the liner ACTUALLY LINES THE DAMN EYES, providing a bold, striking black line. The sloping head shape also aids application, and allows multiple styles to be easily drawn onto the eyelid. It looks a little something (exactly) like this:

malhar_140921_0106

So once you’ve actually got some colour out of the thing, you prey it will last until you are 71 to recoup the stress of the whole damn painful process. Well good news, although it pains me to say, the line is incredibly long lasting…providing you don’t wash for the next 7 decades. Waterproof is not a nature withheld by the product, and so any moisture may provide you with a larger line than desired, and covering a lot more of your face then anticipated…

Other pros of using this product run along the lines of: its bold black colour (when it is so kind to show its face…or however you mould the expression to fit a non living object- oh lord), its flat base, its resistance to clump, and last but most certainly not least it was made in Italy. I always get excited by the thought of a guy with a 10 foot moustache ringing cowbells making eyeliner pens- normal right?

….And the final look is one of about 10,028,264,739,102,837 ways to wear this type of eyeliner, but preferably don’t follow this striking but quite frankly overpowering example:

MASTER_GRAPH_Model-Shot_665x602

(I think the emphasis is on the precision of the line, not the fact she now has a 50/50 white:black ratio eyelid…)


Thank you for reading, passing by, or for just about anything I could find to thank you for!

Sx

Phobia Fever

Having a phobia to something means you strongly fear and dislike. Or in an informal dictionary an abnormal fear which describes me to be honest.

These days people and society judge you for what you love and hate. I am forever getting judged for my phobias because they are not the norm ( i hate that word so much, normmm EW. I actually think I have a phobia of the word norm ) Anyway, I have 4 main fears. Balloons, Electric shocks, bowling and Tomatoes.

journal

Before i tell you about my experiences I thought it would be a great idea to suggest ways which may help your phobias.

  • keep a journal
  • create a fear ladder like a timeline
  • self rewarding
  • relaxing music and meditation
  • record your dreams
  • talk to people

I find that these help with associating your fears with good things and not all bad. Try them out!

My balloon phobia ( also known as Globophobia ) sprouted when I was around the age of 7. I was at a kids birthday party and obviously there were balloons. My uncle started chasing me around the hall and popping them as he went and at such a young age I was petrified and screaming and crying. I now, at the age of 15, cannot touch or go near balloons. They generally make me nervous. So thanks for that Uncle. Weirdly enough this is one of the most common phobias which  affects nearly 3% of the world’s population. FASCINATING!

balloon

Electric shocks I think Is pretty standard but I take it to the next level. Once I was shopping by myself. There was no stairs or anything just this one lift. I was alone and too scared to press the button to call the lift so I waited half an hour for someone to eventually walk over to the lift. I actually just stood there like a moron, what is life. So yes, sadly I have Electrophobia.

I know you are probably thinking “bowling”. How can you be scared of bowling? Well, as a young child I used to have the same nightmare, night after night. It was me bowling in an alley. These 3 butch men would always come and chase me with this giant bowling ball. It doesn’t even sound like a nightmare but I would cry everytime. It is so weird how a dream can influence your actual life and phobias.

bowling shoes

Lycopersicoa is the fear of tomatoes. I saved the worst one til last. My fear of the tiny red things is actually out of this world. Looking at it, Saying the name, hearing the name, even typing tomato makes me feel giddy so I am going to refer to it as Flamingo. I have never eaten a flamingo and only touched it once. Like today at school my friend got a bag of flamingos out of her bag and I walked out the room because I couldn’t deal with the stress. I have honestly never had a bad experience with a flamingo but I just hate them so much tHEY MAKE ME ANGRY!  Sorry I have calmed down now. 

All of my phobias show that you can get them from anywhere. A dream, childhood or even no where atall. And remember that people with all ages have phobias so you are not alone.

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Please comment below what phobias you have and if any of the curing methods helps?

Thank you for reading

Ax

What I Call ‘Life Hacks’

So, you may ask why the featured image for this post is four what appear to be floating bags. You ask this either because you genuinely believe bags can levitate (which, to clarify, they cant), or you just haven’t got round to reading the conveniently named title yet. I can assure you; this blog cannot- and will not- teach you the power of levitation, or even the meaning of the word. No, if that is your destiny, youtube is a much more suitable source.

Right, now I may have lost half the readers to a levitating youtube video (that is a video on levitation, not a video which can levitate…), it may prove highly beneficial to actually get on with the damn blog, before I loose the other half via boredom inflicted death. So here goes, 6 ways to easily (and safely) hack life:

  1. Hack numero uno: The miraculously longer ponytail- with miraculously less long hair.

ohh

This is potentially a hack within a hack. You may have been hacked (<METAPHORICALLY) into thinking this is a hack to hack hair growth. Now besides the gazillion mentions of the word “hack”, I can tell you it isn’t. This hack (here we go again) is a way to imitate the look of a longer, fuller pony by creating two ponytails- a high and a low- which together create…well, a longer, fuller pony tail.

2. Hack dos: Longer lasting waves- without the longer lasting discomfort of curlers or plaits.

oh

Hacking the hack again. This may just look like a women with ocd which cannot stand curly plait nubs (), but in reality, the women most probably doesn’t have ocd, or curly plait nubs, which rules out that option. Running a straightener (or ‘flat iron’– if you are of the American type) over plaited hair crimps and curls the hair- leaving you with long lasting locks.

3. Tres: The correct way to perfume- ‘all day formula’ as the adverts say.

hhhhhheeelllooo

No hacked hack here (< tongue twister much?), just the right places to apply perfume; which makes you wonder, what are classed as the ‘wrong’ places? Feet? Belly button? They all sound credible places to me- perhaps the ‘wrong’ is the awkward moment when the scent of Justin Beiber begins arrising from between your toes. Awkward.

4. Numero cuatro: matte lipstick- without the lipstick being matted.

yesUsing eye shadow on your lips both defeats the objective of the product, and the comfort of your lips- but hey, at least your lips look matted! Applying a dab of appropriately coloured powder over lipstick conceals the shine and voila- you have made matted lipstick (and saved a few million pounds).

5. Cinco: summer dress- from a baggy t-shirt.

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No double wammy with the hacks- “what you see is what you get”, so to speak. It is apparently so easy, it is possible to model the process outside your own front door- or so the picture suggests. It looks great, but what is there to stop it unravelling again? I propose (metaphorically) the discreet use of a safety pin, to avoid what could be a rather embarrassing and quite frankly awkward situation.

6. Numero seis: All in one eye-liner and lash curler…for real.

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So that is…”line” (the top of the lash curler), “curl” (using the lash curler), and then your’e “done” (with the last curler). This is the ultimate hacked hack of the hacks, hence its position at the end of the post, in the hope everyone will have lost interest  and left me and my all-in-last curler to be happy hacking hacks together.


If you have managed so reach this point, you are either bored beyond hope, lost from whatever webpage you originated from, or have somehow managed to enjoy my scrag of a post. Either way, I thank you.

S x