Sadly, this product may not, cannot, and will not transform you into a mermaid, despite its claim to generate a full “mermaid look“. On the upside, however, it’s undeniably salty (duh); which means two things: (1) the contacted hair grows relatively long lasting wavy kinks, (2) the hair tastes, feels, and smells salty. Unless you are some type of salt scientist or sodium chloride enthusiast, I suggest wearing 2330638789 molecules of salt on your head is somewhat uncomfortable- outlining an ever so slight disadvantage of the spray.
Other disadvantages run along the lines of its powers of congealing everything it comes into contact with. Okay. Maybe not everything but still. Onwards. If sprayed within a certain distance of the hair (being too close), you may find yourself with fewer strands of hair than first anticipated, and a lovely new clump-style hair do. So the morale of the story is: all is well if not sprayed to closely. Like most things in life, such as, um…most things.
Another bum note of the product is its ability to grease-ify the hair. Upon recently scanning through the ingredients of the spray (yes, hair sprays have ingredients labels), I was mortified to find several terrifying additives. Among them was “Hydrogenated Castor Oil“- explaining its potential to add a certain unwanted shine to the hair.
PAUSE. REWIND. ^”hair sprays have ingredients labels“:
Ingredients: Agua, PEG-8, Sodium Chloride, Magnesium Sulfate, Phenoxyethanol, Hydrogenated Castor Oil, Parfum, Lactic Acid, Anise Alcohol…”
ACID? ALCOHOL? THIS IS NOT SOME EXPERIMENTAL CHEMISTRY PRACTICAL, WHERE THE SUBJECT OF MATTER IS ACID+ALCOHOL+HUMAN HAIR=?, THIS IS HAIR, ON MY HEAD, WHICH I AM POTENTIALLY DISSOLVING AND THEN FORCE FEEDING ETHANOL SUBSTANCES. Okay. Rant over. I had to make the point.
Besides all the drama a crisis, it pains me to say there are some (a lot) of advantages to this product. Besides its successful attempt at its intended job, the spray smells surprisingly pleasant (Is that anything to do with this “parfum” which sounds suspiciously like “perfume”? The world will never know.) The bottle is also I-N-C-R-E-D-I-B-L-Y Tumblr. Just by the way.
Thank you for or for not reading my 7163276492187th attempt at reviewing this thing, I look forward to the millions of views I will (not) receive after publishing this very post. *sobs in despair*