10 (AND A FEW) EASY WAYS TO MAKE MONEY ONLINE QUICKLY

Lets get down and dirty (metaphorically). You want to earn some ‘dosh‘, a few ‘bones’ (slang: dollar), mega ‘cabbage‘ (slang: paper money, or for the less educated- ‘folding stuff’-also known as ‘dead presidents’- disturbing.), a bit-ta ‘cheddar‘ (slang: money), you want it pronto, but your too much of a lazy sod to get a job (or perhaps your just under-age). So you searched for ‘easy ways to make money‘…like I said, lazy sod. But you’re here now, so lets go:


What you will need:

1. Internet access (duh)

2. Age- and no, I will not tell you how to buy age… (try a facelift or something). The majority of these                                     options require you to be 18 or over, if your not then your stuffed (metaphorically). Get a parents’                                           consent to use their details. Don’t ask strangers, only the friendly ones, like ‘family‘ I think they’re                                           called.


NUMERO UNO: PAID ONLINE SURVEYS

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It’s as basic as it sounds…paid online surveys are surveys online which pay, paid for being an online surveyee(). I’m sure you’ve heard of Opinion Outpost, if not you must of lived under some type of metaphorical rock. It’s as simple as putting on a pair of pink pants in the morning: visit https://www.opinionoutpost.co.uk/, sign up using your gender, first and forenames, and email, and chose surveys that tinkle your fancy (metaphorically). Payments are issued via Paypal, and before you say: “DO YOU THINK I AM SOME TYPE OF ONION? I’M NOT GIVING MY CREDIT CARD CREDENTIALS TO SOME GROTTY FOREIGN SURVEY WEBSITE“- firstly, rude. Secondly, the domain name is conveniently fitted with a neat little “s” on the end of its “http”; this means the website is secure- hence the “s”. (or more literally- it means “Hypertext Transfer Protocol Secure”).

Other paying survey sites: Toluna, Vivatic, MySurvey, YouGov, SurveyBods, Valued Opinions, The Opinion Panel, OnePolliPoll, Global Test Market, Hiving, PanelBase, Harris Poll, Opinion Outpost, Your word, Pinecone, IPSOS, New Vista.

NUMERO DOS: PAID FOR SEARCHING THE WEB

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Pink pants again. Qmee.com is a site which monitors your search history, and suggests sites which are of relevance to you. If you so chose to click onto a suggested site- you will be rewarded. You probably lost your knickers at “monitors your search history“- but again, this website is of the “https” variety. Visit https://www.qmee.com/ for further information.

NUMERO TRES: REVIEW MUSIC

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Slicethepie is a fantabulous (no, not a spelling mistake) way to earn a bitta dosh. Write reviews on new songs, commercials and fashion items before they release, and you receive dollars- (sucks to be British sometimes). To sign up enter your names (that is your first and last, not nicknames- as nice as they may be “smelly” isn’t relevant) email, create a password, and enter your DOB. From then on is pink pants.

NUMERO CUATRO: BE A MYSTERY SHOPPER 

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You may think the OOTD of a mystery shopper is that of a long brown coat vaguely resembling a bin bag and specks that are so big they practically engulf your whole face. No. Wear whatever delightfulness you wish. “Mystery shopping- agencies that pay you to visit all sorts of shops to feedback on how they are performing”. Pink pants. I personally have no experience of these. My first thought was that along the lines of “I’m going to be murdered“- telling a website you will visit a certain shop sounds like a recipe for kidnap, or a speed dating set up- but the website has no indication as to which branch of the chosen store you will visit, or on which day at which time, so you may (or may not) survive the experience.

NUMERO CINCO: PROMOTE COMPANIES ON YOUR BLOG

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So your on this blog- meaning you either have a blog, are interested in blogging, or have just stubbled upon this rather disappointing jumble of words out of a rather unfortunate error. Either way, promoting companies products on your blog/ website/ social media could earn you a wee penny. Some companies reward for sole promotion, others when the promotion results in a purchase, but either way, their is money at the end of the rainbow- no pot of gold, sorry. A good website to try is  Affiliate Window.

NUMERO SEIS: BE AN EXTRA ON TV

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We all see those lame people lingering in the background on Corrie, wishing they would bugger off so we could focus on the important stuff. Well newsflash- the ‘lame‘ people earn £60-80 just by standing there or walking past in a 3 second shot. Don’t go thinking this means instant lifelong fame and a career in Hollywood- it doesn’t. It means a brief 3 seconds of tv visivility- by which time people will have forgotten about you in the following 2 seconds and gone to make their 26th cup of green tea. But hell- fame is fame. Be On Screen and 2020 casting are two ways into your 3 second fame.

NUMERO SIETE: RENT YOUR HOUSE FOR FILMING

Adverts say “sign up to Sky Unlimited and feel like all your favourite shows are right in your living room“- literally. My House Your Shoot pays to film in your house, which is then broadcast on national television. “OH MY GOD GRATED BANANAS THAT’S AMAZING…wait then 278412964867913 people will know where I live“- well potentially. But unfortunately for you, it is the house they are after filming, not you. So the house will remain anonymous from you.

NUMERO OCHO: SELL YOUR STORIES TO THE PAPERS

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A pigeon flu through and smashed a window at a university. Wow relevant. No but really- they sold the story to The Sun for a tidy £50. You don’t have to of been kidnapped or anything dramatic- any story that makes for a ‘nice‘ read will do. Perhaps you got stuck in a lampshade and had to go to A&E to have the object surgically removed, or super-glued a shoelace to your eyebrow- either way its a double wammy- money and fame (/publicly global humiliation).

NUMERO NUEVE: GET PAID TO DO SET TASKS 

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Toluna, Swagbucks.com, InboxPounds and PaidOffers give cash rewards for completing set tasks. These can be as commonly boring or unusual as you want. Some, particularly the hilariously named ‘Swagbucks.com‘ , pay you for tasks you do already- like hopping onto ye old jolly Amazon.com. Think of it as Game Of Thrones or something, you have to complete each level to get the reward (< i’ve never played that game in my life, is it even a thing, does it even have levels?).

NUMERO DIEZ (HORRAH): ‘GIGS FOR FIVERR’- PAID FOR ANYTHING

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Gigs For Fiver is a site which you can advertise anything. Like ANYTHING. A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G (within reason, please). You could literally advertise as a ‘professional bloomer folder‘, and if someone needs a professional to fold their bloomers- BAM- you have an extra fiver. (Golden rule- you charge a fiver, clue is in the name “gigs for FIVERR”).

NUMERO DIEZ PLUS A FEW:

Other less extraordinary money making ways include: selling old stuff online (ebay), via long term blogging/ youtube, entering competitions, mobile phone recycling, write a kindle ebook (amazing is the ultimate selling machine), being a charity collector, babysitting and dog walking. Is that enough? Good.


Now you are rich and famous, you will probably never visit here again, so farewell, adios amigos, au revoir. All recommendations are those I believe are safe and sound- which really meanings nothing because my judgement is little more reliable than that of a brussel sprout. But never the less- happy money-earning!

Thank you for reading,

S x

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